Perhaps you have a problem, an interior decoration problem. We all have our problems with the placement of chairs. The wardrobe. Our favorite red, white and black clothes. What we feed the housecat. When did we last lose the housecat? Perhaps you have a problem, an interior decoration problem. Did you know that 'interior design regret choice syndrome' is the most commonly diagnosed condition among the 15 to 35 demographic in Conniption, New Jersey? Perhaps you have a problem, an interior decoration problem. It is very easy to receive the diagnosis as a young homeowner. At first you are ascendant in the ranks and well-received by your neighbors. But then you begin to go mad. The cherry wood quotient isn't filled. Maybe you have too much marble? Why is everything marble, even the furnace? Perhaps you have a problem, an interior decoration problem. Rather individualizing your home to represent the Me, you find that you have been a trendchaser. Instagram, Pinterest, Tumblr blogs. The image exists in the present tense and ideas are owned by no one. In Conniption, New Jersey, this is the biggest problem. Fad-loose and fad-prone, everybody clamors to get a cut of the sugar sweetened, almond milky Art Deco living space. Perhaps you have a problem, an interior decoration problem. The sun sets on another private equity broker day in Conniption, New Jersey. Tripartite bikes sail on flat land. There are hills rolling and being scarred. This is the flattest and most montane land in the US of A depending on who's getting asked. Suburbia, beautiful suburbia. Look, I'm not gonna beat around the bush here. There are people coming tomorrow, and they are interested. They are really interested. If you want to beat them for the goddamn apartment, you should probably hurry.